Rhythm and the Blues

I have tried over the last few months to accept and deal with my inevitable lay off, slated for March 2009, but will probably come sooner. I alternate between the denial, procrastination of looking into alternative work prospects; and generally just cruzin’ for the brusin’. The whole thing has a lack of rhythm.
Prior to the announcement of our demise, things were busy. There was a guarantee that everyday I showed up at 6:30 a.m. there would be something, a lot of something to do. With the agenda full, I set to the business of completing the tasks at hand and left each day feeling I had accomplished a "noble" deed.
As the work slowed because Merrill Lynch and First Franklin were going in two different directions, Merrill being the parent, FF the red-haired step child, there was talk of expected let down and lay offs.
Then "the LIST" made its way into our department and we saw the dissections and flat out dismissal of our friends and foes alike. "Why was that person laid off, they contributed a lot to the department", "She has worked here over 15 years, now what?", and the ever popular, and I do mean popularity contests, "She/he is only staying because she/he knows someone up higher". There was a total lack of sense. The rhythm was gone. The clock stalled at high noon.
This is what greed smells like.
My friends and family looked to me when I mentioned I was in the throws of the meltdown, as if I should have said something! Me!? My peers and I saw it coming in the form of an attitude of "no self denial". Everyone was wooed with false promises and ‘quick sand’ guarantees. All the brokers had two and three cells phones to conduct business. The Account Executives scrambled to catch the next rising star. And the lack of the beat went on. There is a beat that goes, one, two, three, and four. They skipped a couple of counts like where it counts to be honest, forthright, prudent and considerate.
So here we have a lack of rhythm and a lot of blues. Oh, Mr. King would have had a good time with this one!

Medical Wonders

Well, today I completed the mandatory "check in with me every $1000. ahemmm no what I meant to say was...every 6months" appointment with my primary care doctor.

At my age, I wear my medical conditions as a badge of experience and endurance~! I guess I never really understood that the human body is a machine that eventually wears out and parts start to be replaced.

There is there ever popular colonoscopy ~ WEEEE, the preparation is worse than the procedure. Mammograms are great comedic material until you are the patient. And then the knee joints connected to the ...opps.. no connection, looks like arthritis has done it's job here.
On that note, as I leaned heavily on a stylish blue cane, I was prescribed a "Bledsoe Thruster RLF" brace for my knee which has lopsided cartilage. As the technician was fitting me, he offered a wide variety of "colors". I was surprised. I thought they were all military black... so, your gonna love this... I chose Paradise Pink!!!! Hey, there is no reason I have to advertise the aliment, but I can do it in style!!! This clever contraption is very good at it's purpose *(and as my uncle used to say, "otta be, cost enough!"). The ticket price? $2500! Oh yeah, and the black stocking I put on under it to prevent chaffing? $249.99! I tell ya, it's a racket and I feel like making one over the corner we are put in with medical services.
My doctor, who has never been 2 ounces over his target weight, seems to think that all you have to do is cut down your portions and the world is your oyster. Better make that something with less cholesterol! I have talked about gastric bypass surgery and today I breached (as in whale)the subject with him. I told him I wasn't looking for a magic bullet, which seems weird to me...why would I shoot myself??? Anyway, I feel like I am getting the most information I can and yet he still wanted to "refer" me to a gastric guy, another boat payment has to be made after all. I guess he thinks I will talk with his guy and come to the realization the cutting down portions is the only out, or not.

I love my life. I really do. And my blog is showing the side of me that may not ring true to the former sentence. I guess life is meant to frustrate us sometimes so we can relish the contrast when things are perfect. Did I say THAT??!!?? OK, not perfect but certainly more rosy than not....